[Dertt]

So today I was thinking, why make edible underwear? All this crap I see in magazines and at the end of adult dvds is almost comical when you compare it to how it really works. A few years back when I was still dating in highschool I planned on letting this really nice guy go all the way. I wore these strawberry flavored panties and a matching bra, which, under the heat of my body kind of melted when the time came. It just made me thankful I had shaved the kitty a day before, because if I hadn't it would of been like waxing... But worse. Anyway, he got down there and it came time to "cough, cough" and then he was all like "This stuff tastes like a condom." That statement on its own led me to some pretty weird conclusions. After I had scooted that little tidbit out of my head, the doorbell rang and it turned out it was his girlfriend. I hadn't known. I walked to the door in a bathrobe and let her in (AWKWARD!). It was then and there that I noticed the lower half of my sweet suprise was hanging down my leg and she was staring at it. It was bad that I hadn't known this sweet and innocent guy was such an asshole cheater, but it was even worse that I had nearly gone the paces with him with this stupid underwear on.

That happened to me once... well, actually, I was trying to eat the underwear off of myself and I broke my neck and died.